+ protocol predicament: communal food.

Apologies for the past two posts, no excuse will suffice other than I abused my blogging privileges, as some teachers/parents would describe my misuse.

Alice (the one who delved into the land of wonderment, yes that one) disobeyed all communal food etiquette when she arrived at the tea party empty handed.
I believe there is a 'food law', as I like to plainly label it, that states that anyone who brings food, is entitled to food. No arguments here, I completely agree.
However it's not specific enough.

(now this picture is rather distracting from my point but I'd just like to draw attention to that flattering white top & shelf bra, the fact that all of the displayed food is sushi and what the hell is that black and white billion piece game??)

How much food does each individual provide? What quality? Does home baked, grandmothers deathbed secret recipe equate to a box of Arnott's Assorted Variety or Double Decker Tim-Tams? If there are left overs can I take them home? Is the provider the supplier (in terms of food and cutlery)?? If someone brings pasta bake can I bring spaghetti bolognaise or is that a carbohydrate pasta overload? Are two varieties of salad permitted? Is it strictly limited to main and desert or is the option of entre/starter completely irrational? What quantity are we talking here, or are we discussing quality?? Oh my goodness.


Please, What's the protocol?


*Just quietly, I only just realized that there is no underline function on this blogging thingamabob. Severely disappointed and now reconsidering my membership with "BlogSpot" - shakes fist at computer monitor*


Struggling with this concept I therefore find many social situations difficult. Today was a prime example. A tute lunch picnic. aka: a hostile infusion of two separate occasions where the sharing of food is compulsory. Being secretly (not so anymore) apprehensive I prompted assignments for each girl, in hope that this exercize would navigate my anxiety away.
How wrong. I thought I was clever, and volunteered myself to fetch drinks for the fun picnic (hooray...), again, wrong Hannah, wrong. How much drink? How many litres? Should I provide a spectrum of drinks, ranging from the juices, to sparkling water, to soft drink, to punch? Individual drinks? Value for money drinks? Quality brand drinks? Am I automatically responsible for the disposable cups as well now? My goodness, the intricacies.

Its social anomalies like this that need to be ironed out. Another example being when you unexpectedly walk into another person (hopefully unplanned, I truly hope that people don't wander about in hope of colliding with another human) and are then presented with the [step to the side - they step to the side - you step back - they step back] conundrum. How preventable! If only someone simply enforced the rule that you step to the right, then the whole awkward meeting would have been avoided altogether!
So any readers, so all eleven of you, install this protocol into your social hardrive now!! (bit of mac/pc lingo for you there nerdicons)

So how do you avoid these situations? Not a rhetorical question by the way.
My solution for my earlier predicament: buy 9L of different varieties of drink.

Stay Tuned.
life's narcissistic narrator.
+ the red fox.

-OVER AND OUT-